Camping for Thanksgiving

 Last year, we went camping for Thanksgiving and it was a magical experience. It snowed in the desert which was completely unexpected and we have some wonderful memories from it. We want on a ride through the hills and it was literally like driving through a Hallmark Christmas movie (one of my many guilty pleasures during the holidays). It was like a winter wonderland and just undeniably gorgeous. We decided that we are going to go camping again this Thanksgiving this year but not expecting to get lucky enough for a snowy experience yet again. These are just a few photos from last year. 

We had just gotten settled in when it started snowing. Bugaboo had never been in the snow before and he was excited to catch a snowflake on his tongue. 

We were excited to see the snow start falling and sticking to the ground. 

Just a couple hours later and we had snow. 

Bugaboo throwing his first snowball. We had epic snowball fight with him, chickadee and me. It was a lot of fun and the kids loved every moment of it. 

Chickadee making a mini snowman on her toy jeep. There wasn't enough clean snow to make a large snowman on the ground, but we could make mini ones on the different vehicles we had around. She was so excited. 

Even on the way home the snows were completely covered and it was a beautiful drive. 

We are going to go camping Friday morning through Sunday, now I just have to come up with some extra activities since I am not sure I can use the snow to distract them this year. So what are your thanksgiving plans? Do you have any suggestions for fun activities to keep the kids busy while camping? When was the last time you went camping? 

Until next time which I am sure will be all about food, I am just going to continue on this activity searching journey...

Halloween During a Pandemic

 Due to the restrictions of the pandemic, Halloween didn't quite go the same as years past. Instead of trick or treating and passing out candy, we had a whole new experience. We spent the first part of the afternoon swimming in my parent's new pool (they moved 15 minutes away from me YAY!!!!). Then after getting out some much needed energy, we carved pumpkins. We had the kids clean out their pumpkins of all the innards, draw faces on them and then carved them. They had so much fun as you can see. 

Bugaboo is not a fan of touching the inside of the pumpkin with his hands. He used his hands once this year but I didn't catch it on camera. But spoon scooping is just as effective if not more so. 

Chickadee was arm deep as soon as I opened the pumpkin for her. She was happy getting her hands dirty and get all of the pumpkin guts out. 

The pumpkins turned out great!

After pumpkin carving and clean up, we moved on to the next activity of the day, cake decorating! 

We made a graveyard cake... This can be made with any flavor cake that you want as the base. After cooled frost the cake. Then take chocolate sandwich cookies crush them completely and sprinkle on top of the cake. Cover the entire top of the cake, to create the dirt. Then take milano cookies, cut them in half and push them in to make the tombstones. If you have some melted chocolate or edible marker to write RIP on the tombstones then go for it. Also add in some gummy worms that are moving through the dirt or some pumpkin candies throughout. 

These zombies loved decorating the cake. Once dessert was made, it was costume time. 

Even though they couldn't go trick or treating, we didn't want to deny the kids the chance to dress up. 

My kids and their cousins dressed up and ready for the next activity. 

My Bugaboo is riding a t-rex around and he loves it. He loves dinosaurs and was ecstatic with this costume. 

Chickadee dressed up as Mal from Descendants. She is a big fan of all the musicals that the Disney channel puts out and loves to sing and dance along with them. 

Once costumes were on and pictures were taken, it was time for the final activity of the night. 

A search for glow in the dark bugs!!!!!

They were some nifty little toys with glow stick that we stuck around the dark back yard and had the kids search for them kind of like an easter egg hunt. The kids had so much fun that we sent them inside for a piece of cake and hid them again. 

After that it was time to clean up, putting everything away and getting ready to go. Each kid was sent home with a bag of candy still. 

What did you do for Halloween during the pandemic? Did you have any fun and unique ideas that you guys did this year? 

Until next time, I'll just continue on in this unprecedented journey...

Kindness and Compassion

 Trying to teach my children kindness and compassion in today's world has been exceedingly difficult. I look around and find a serious lack of kindness or compassion which is disheartening and saddening. It was pointed out to me that I might be more on the defensive in the way I view how people react in situations given that I have a child with special needs and see how he is treated by people in a dismissive and negative way, which encourages my continuing lack of faith in people. 

In our household, we encourage our children to accept people for exactly who they are. We discourage any form of bullying and encourage respect, compassion and kindness. We remind our children that everyone is different and that is a good thing. Everyone has a different perspective, opinion and ideas which can provide information that you might not have known otherwise. We push for them to stand up for their friends, invite everybody to play and not to follow others but think for themselves. 

In the same conversation where I was told that I might be defensive, I was told that I was burdening Chickadee because it seems I am forcing her to be protective of her Autistic brother and ideals that are beyond her comprehension at age 7. I have several thoughts on this that I didn't get a chance to eloquently reply with at the time. First and foremost, I believe that it is never a burden to be a good person, honestly how could it be. I reinforce kindness and compassion for all people not just her brother. It takes just as much effort to be kind and compassionate as it does to be rude, disrespectful and hateful. There is not a time that I would ever let my children treat people that way and let them get away with it because children are not born knowing right from wrong or good from bad. It is my job as their parent to teach them how to treat people and I take that very seriously. Second, I do not expect her to fight her brother's battles and this is for several reasons. First, this would suggest that he isn't capable of standing up for himself which is not the case at all. Autistic people are perfectly capable of voicing their opinions, standing up for themselves and providing people with open and informative discussions. Autism my make them different but it does not make them incapable. Another is to suggest that we are expecting more from her than is capable at age 7. We have told her that if she sees people being mean to others that she can tell them to stop or go get an adult to help with the situation. Reinforcing the idea that she is capable of standing up for herself, her brother and her friends and that adults are there to help. We want her to be strong and capable which does not happen over night. In order for the lesson to stick, we need to reinforce this idea continuously until we no longer need to remind them. It is never to early to start teaching children kindness or compassion and never to late to show it or express it. I think people do not given children enough credit with their capabilities of understanding and observing. 

In today's world with the pandemic, protests, politics and basically everything falling down around us, it seems that kindness and compassion are needed so much more. Everywhere I look, it seems that people are dismissive and negative. I have seen so much name calling, and horrendous written comments and people treating each other just horribly. I have seen people throw hateful words towards others for having a difference of opinion. How is it possible to have an open, honest, respectful conversation with someone if you are going to dismiss them because they don't believe absolutely everything you do? How is it fair or reasonable to encourage differences as long as they are the ones that you approve of? How is it 2020 and we still have to discuss that everybody is different or how to have an actual conversation? I honestly believe that kindness, compassion and love are the most powerful things in the entire world (an idea that I share with my children constantly) and it can change the world but we can't make changes if we can't have a conversation. When talking to someone who doesn't carry your same beliefs or opinions, ask yourself if you are really listening to them when they talk. Do you honestly understand where they are coming from or are you dismissing them for not believing exactly what you believe? What was the last real conversation you had?

I try to have as honest conversations as I can while listening and being respectful. In order to maintain my open mindedness, I have made changes on my social media feeds to provide more kindness and acceptance for me to view daily. I follow the Body Image Movement, Returning the Favor and other positive messages to fill my feed with things that bring me joy and happiness because if I am happy it is easier to exude kindness and compassion for me. I am open to differences of opinions, beliefs and values so you can be honest with me...Am I being to harsh on people and society? Is there more kindness and compassion? Do you think I am burdening my children? How do you teach your children about compassion and kindness? What do you do to show kindness, compassion and understanding? 

Although the ride maybe bumpy and filled with many twists and turns, I will just continue on this journey of an everyday mom...

Life is Definitely Different...

 How to even begin discussing all the changes that have occurred? The world is a different place now and life is definitely not the same. It feels like so much has changed and it is a struggle for me as an adult let alone my children. For Hubby and I, work has been a little crazy. I have been considered an essential employee throughout the entire pandemic and therefore have been at work onsite the entire time. I don't know what I would do if it weren't for Hubby. I mean seriously I don't know how he does it. Since he already worked from home, this did not change but he has been pulled onto daily 12 hour long conference calls since March. This with two children running around the house confused and with distance learning, I'm telling you he has surprised and impressed me so much during this time. I cannot praise the man enough (really my appreciation knows no bounds for him). I know many people have been either unemployed or moved to working from home which are huge adjustments to make. This alone is difficult but add in parenting, shutdowns and distance learning and it is all sorts of immense craziness. 

Lets start with distance learning...I know that making the decisions about what was best for our family was a difficult decision when it came to choosing what form of school the kids would be going through this year. It didn't help that our district was still attempting answers up until the decision had to be made. Watching an 8 hour long board of education meeting that lasted until after midnight when I had to get up at 4 am the next morning for work was difficult but it was necessary to come up with the best decision for our family that we could make. Distance learning is difficult, especially with a special needs child with an IEP. Luckily he has been doing well so far, but we have had to fight for his one on one aide to be kept for him (after we fought to get her in the first place). Bugaboo's class starts at 8:30 until 2:30 everyday. He has online session with his teacher from 8:30 until about 12:00 which is all up to Hubby since he is the one home and on a conference call usually during this time (really can't express my immense gratitude for this amazing man). Chickadee's day starts at 12:45 and goes until 7:00 pm. Her live session with her teacher is from 3:45 until 7:00 in the evening which I am usually home for. Then there is homework and help with independent work and trying to get programs to work and times when the link doesn't work. Can I just say that I do not like trying to figure out common core math...(I am constantly having to look at their books or watch the videos and then go why????? prior to helping them with their assignment. Anybody with me on this?) At one point when we were working on getting one on one aide time for Bugaboo, we were told by the district that he didn't need it because we were home with him and we were supposed to be his support. Now we attempt to be his support as much as possible but trying to be all of this with our current work schedules was more than just "difficult" as the district attempted to put it, it is more like daunting. (Although when Bugaboo's teacher asked his class who they talk to when they are scared, or happy or need help and he answered with mommy, daddy and sister it just made me feel like I am actually doing something right which is always a nice feeling.) But seriously, trying to navigate work for Hubby and I, both the kids school schedules and be 100 times more involved with everyday school work has been stressful and overwhelming and frustrating. Sometimes we want to scream, or pull our hair out or both. Yet that is not all that is difficult when it comes to what is happening in the world today. 

Trying to explain to my kids about a global pandemic, shutdowns and changes in the world has been extremely difficult. Trying to express how significant it is while not overwhelming them is frustrating. I attempt to be as completely honest as I can, not to downplay anything while not making them scared to just live and be kids. Finding a balance in all of this, dealing with my own personal feelings and frustrations while trying to help them navigate their feelings and how to deal with them is overwhelming some days. I have lost my cool, yelled and cried and then apologized profusely for taking it out on them. I have expressed that is okay to be frustrated, to yell into a pillow when you can't get it out any other way, to cry and be mad. I have given hugs and reassurances while reminding them to wear their masks, wash their hands and just be kind to everyone because this hard for everyone. I have to search a little harder for the silver lining in most things but overall, we have banded together as a family and supported one another. We may have had a few fights but we found ways to communicate better with each other about what we need (which may include a mommy time out until she can get her bearings back). It is okay to ask for help! 

The journey this year has had more bumps, bruises, ups and downs than ever before. There are more questions than answers, more frustrations than joyous moments and unexpected changes. I am expecting the zombie apocalypse to occur at any moment. What has changed for you? How are you handling distance learning? If you want to know anything else in regards to how things are going for us or how we explained something to our children, feel free to reach out. If you need help, feel free to ask and I will help you find the support you need. Until next time (which I hope will be much sooner than this) just keep holding onto hope on this journey...

During uncertain times...

During all of the uncertainty of today's world, it seems that the role of a parent has completely changed in the recent weeks and the need for interaction and support has multiplied. With the kids home from school, stores closed and many people's jobs uncertain and a virus running rampant across the world, fear and frustration are clearly  emotions people are dealing with daily. Isolation is a necessity right now, making human connection much more precious. Everyday life has completely changed and this change is not an easy thing to deal with. It is completely understandable to be afraid, frustrated, stressed or uncertain.

Hubby and I are considered essential employees based on the work we do with governmental and health care customers. Hubby is working from home and pulling triple duty by taking care of the kids and the shopping and things around the house while working. I have been unfortunately sick for a little over a week and am finally feeling better (my fever has broken and I am no longer experiencing any symptoms of the cold I had), moved out of isolation (I was quarantined away from the kids and hubby to make sure they don't get sick) and back to work (I have to go in). It has been a crazy couple of weeks (following a crazy few months, the beginning of 2020 has not been very kind) but we are pulling through. I have to admit with the kids being home, the mom guilt is kicking in big time but that is a blog post for another time. Mostly the feelings of stress and being completely overwhelmed have run Hubby and I a little ragged. So if you are feeling any of this, that is completely normal. If the kids are driving you a little insane (or a lot) that is completely normal.

I watched a very helpful video from a life coach (Kemi Nekvapil) the other day that gave great advice for what to do to help with the feelings that are so prevalent (THANK YOU RESET SUMMIT from the Body Image Movement you should check it out https://bodyimagemovement.com/resources/the-reset-summit/). If you notice yourself being overwhelmed, angry, scared, stressed...stop take a breath and ask yourself what do I need right now and how do I get it? Is it a time out for a couple minutes, comfort food, watching something that will make you laugh or calling someone that is supportive in ways you need. Whatever it is let yourself have what you need. Realize that there is only so much that you can do. If you are providing those you love with what they need for support and taking care of yourself then that is the best thing you could be doing.

Another thing that she mentioned was what can you create or build right now? What is something creative that you can do that will bring you joy? Most people feel relaxation and joy by being creative, so by allowing yourself to create during this time is a helpful way to spend some time doing something to make you smile. It's positive energy, happy healing and mind clearing relaxation.

How are you all holding up right now? What are some projects you are working on while being on isolation? Are any of you essential employees (Thank you so much for continuing making it possible for life to continue going and working so hard everyday!!!)? If any of you need help, please reach out. If you are in need of support let me know. If you want someone to understand or just listen I am willing.

Just know that I am right there with you all during these uncertain times and will continue on this journey, struggling through the changes that are what the world is currently...